For parents bringing up a neurodiverse kid, everyday may feel like managing therapies, routines, meltdowns, and unexpected progress, all while taking care of a second child who might have an entirely different world and needs.
The relationship between the siblings may not be smooth, but the siblings are often the child’s first friend, teacher, and share a lifelong bond. For parents bringing up two very different journeys under one roof can be both challenging and an unexpected source of hope.
The Parenting Balancing Act No One Talks About
Most parents may not talk much about this in our community but they may face challenges and ask questions to themselves about:
“How can I give time to both of my children?”
“I feel guilty that my other child has to adjust so much.”
“ My child is so patient, but I worry if we are missing their needs.”
Having a neurodiverse kid may reshape the family routines entirely, from how morning get started to how vacations are planned. For the neurotypical sibling, it means learning flexibility earlier, understanding that things may not always be fair, and being the one who waits, adapts or steps back.
And yet, this can be a very special kind of relationship rooted with empathy, growth and authenticity for both children.
A Built-In Buddy: Where Therapy Meets Play
In clinical settings, the learning is always focused in a structured way, but at home, most growth happens in a spontaneous and playful way. This is where a sibling plays a great role.
Whether it’s building blocks, playing game of tag, or just pretending to cook in living room, these everyday games allow neurodiverse kids to practice important lifeskills like:
- Communications through gestures, sounds or shattered attention.
- Problem solving when a game does not go as planned.
- Taking turns during games.
- Emotional regulation with a sibling with a calming and grounding presence.
Siblings may not always realize the role they are playing , but a small smile, a moment of patience or willingness to slow down can be very powerful. A child may speak more confidently, take more initiatives, or engage more deeply just because their sibling was helping them .
Seeing the Neurotypical Sibling, Too
As a parent, focusing so much on a neurodiverse child, you may unintentionally overlook the emotional needs of the siblings. They may not share their feelings, but they may notice when it’s uneven, or when plans are cancelled or if their questions go unanswered.
They may grow faster in some ways like learning to be gentle, observant, and patient. But those traits may come from emotional processing they haven’t had space for.
Here’s what we encourage parents to remember:
- Make time for individual children: Even 20–30 minutes of one-on-one time can mean the world.
- Let them ask hard questions: Neurotypical siblings may wonder “why can’t they talk like me?” or “why do they get more help?”; answer them honestly and help them feel safe and seen.
- Validate their feelings: It’s okay for them to feel upset, left out, or confused. You must listen to them and build trust.
- Celebrate both children’s growth: Even when the milestones look very different, both journeys are valid and meaningful.
Connection Without Expectation
One of the most beautiful aspects of a sibling relationship is that it is just a raw and real connection. For neurodiverse kids who may find it difficult to engage with socially unfamiliar spaces, their siblings may become their safe space.
At LifeLab Kids, we have seen how a child’s anxiety is reduced and they open up emotional engagement when they share laughter, a routine bedtime story, or just simply sitting together. These moments may seem small but they actually support the therapeutic goals which help a child regulate, express and connect on their own terms.
Even simple activities can become developmental milestones:
- Board games teach a child patience and following rules
- Outdoor play improves spatial awareness and motor skills
- Storytelling or pretend play leads to creativity and language
Siblings without even realizing it are shaping these moments.
How Families Can Support Sibling Bonds
Below are the few practices that parents can follow:
- Create Shared Experience: You can do some activities which can let both the children enjoy whether it’s painting, cooking or just park outing.
- Celebrate Strengths and Differences: Talk openly about what each child enjoys or face issues with. Help them with empathy and respect.
- Balance Together time and Solo time: It may happen that both the siblings have separate interests, you should support both connections.
- Involve Siblings in the Journey: If a sibling wants to watch or join a therapy session let them, this will open the window for building connections and reduce the mystery.
A Lifelong Relationship in the Making
As children grow, so do their roles in each other’s lives. The siblings who used to play together might one day help in navigating them in teenage years or even in adulthood.
The siblings remain the most consistent and trusted relationship, they are the ones who get them without any judgement.
From toddlers sharing a sensory table to teens motivating them for fitness sessions, there is a magic watching siblings move together through the world together but differently.
LifeLab Kids: Where Families Grow Together
While our programs are designed to support neurodiverse children, we see and value the full picture: the caregivers, the siblings, the shared journey.
Through music, art, movement, and social programs, we create environments where connection thrives — not just for the child in therapy, but for the sibling standing beside them.
Because we believe that when one child grows, the whole family grows with them.